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June 13, 2012

Poor Tom's Almanac: No telling which fortune is right

My day started off like any other. Up in the morning, a quick workout, shave, shower and down to breakfast. My routine hasn't changed in nearly 50 years, except in isolated situations like early medical appointments or trips.

Like we do every morning, I grab the sports pages and my wife takes the rest of the newspaper. I was eye-deep into a Boston Celtics victory story when all of a sudden, a voice across the table piped up from behind one of the pages.

"You might want to hear your horoscope today. It doesn't sound very pleasant."

Truth be told, I pay very little attention to such predictions and I wasn't about to start now. Being a Libra (Sept. 30), I tend to have some balance to my life. I respond to situations with grace and am said to put others at ease.

In case you don't know, Libra is the only Zodiac symbol that's neither animal nor human — but surely that doesn't make me any less human. Between you and me, it's the most sociable of signs, so I really have little or nothing to worry about.

Until today ...

"Says you're about to miss your mark today," my wife proclaimed. "A necessary change of plans will cause you some stress.

"But listen to this. Instead of wasting energy worrying about a setback, process your disappointment quickly so you can set new goals and try again.

"You may not put much faith in these proclamations," she continued, "but I wouldn't ignore them. You never can tell."

Suddenly, my day was off to a bad start. Setback? Stress? Change of plans? Where was I headed, to the Looney Tunes bed? Better to crawl under it than on top of it. I needed a tranquilizer.

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